Every thirty minutes, in a dark, dingy and dreadful room, an innocent girl undergoes the horrific experience of sexual assault. Her piercing cries for help are left unanswered, and eventually, an aching silence engulfs the room. Afterward, she cries, she weeps, and seeks justice; but instead of helping her, a fallacy is propagated to silence her. This fallacy blames her – claiming that it was her fault; that she shouldn’t have dressed up in such “provocative” attire; that she shouldn’t have been out alone at night, and that she was ‘asking for it’.
Unfortunately, the predicament of sexual assault has always birthed victim-blaming rather than a fight for justice – a long overdue and well-deserved fight for justice. The prevalence of the victim-blaming ideology fundamentally ensures that victims refrain from convicting their perpetrators. With only 2% of rapists spending a day in prison, abuse rates are undoubtedly increasing globally. It is time that we make this stop! We keep excusing rapists’ behavior by saying, “men will be men,” but if we can train dogs to shake our hands, then we can educate men on the importance of consent.
Just a couple of weeks ago, a mother was brutally gang-raped in front of her two children on a Pakistani motorway. Words cannot describe the trauma that she and her child have elicited in the face of this horrific occurrence. Yet, according to the police, it was her fault for driving a car on a deserted highway without male companionship.
So I ask, what about the infamously notorious case of Nirbhaya? She was accompanied by a male friend, yet beaten black and blue and inhumanely gang-raped on a moving bus. They tortured her to the point that her intestines fell out of her body. Yet, society blamed her for dressing up provocatively.
What about Zainab Ansari: a seven-year-old? One who was regrettably subjected to the same agony of sexual assault. Rather outrageously, society blamed her parents for neglecting her; for leaving her alone, and for believing that a seven-year-old would not be sexualized by a perverted psychopath. You may not be surprised when I say sexual assault and harassment have also asserted their dominance in more affluent regions and amongst the elite.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a prominent congresswoman in the United States of America, was subject to the scrutiny of sexual harassment. A photoshopped video of her brutal rape was circulated on a closed Facebook group for border agents. When she spoke against this cruel and twisted “joke” at a congressional hearing, her patriotism was questioned. Why? Because people failed to understand that there was nothing traitorous about speaking up against this misogyny. In the face of such harassment, if powerful politicians don’t stand a chance, who’s to say common citizens will?
Frankly, this sort of inequality is encouraged by our own internalized misogyny. For example, when we hear about a sexual assault case at a party, we immediately think, “What was she wearing?” or “Was she drinking?” This is because our minds almost immediately start thinking of alternative scenarios in which the assault is prevented. However, we need to change this mentality and learn that instead of asking such regressive questions, we must ask, “Was the perpetrator arrested?”
It’s time that society finally stepped out of the comfort of their ignorance to make a change. It’s time that “locker-room talks” be discouraged- rather than accusing victims, we need to raise our voices against this inequality, patriarchy, and misogyny. In fact, we need to encourage both men and women to speak against their abusers. Society as a whole needs to further motivate men to come forward if they have been abused. We must acknowledge that men too are assaulted and that it is acceptable for them to speak about it.
Most importantly, the problem lies in the world’s justice systems and lenient attitude towards sexual offenders. If a parasite is left unattended, it can cause severe harm. Similarly, a pedophile that is not locked up in a psychiatric hospital can leech the innocence of hundreds of children. Consequently, we need to reform our justice systems to penalize such criminals severely.
As a community, we can ensure that rather than blaming victims, we condemn rape. Remember, only rapists cause rape. The victim has nothing to do with it, for no one ever asks to be raped!